Friday, January 09, 2009

Officially a Waffy Girl

I had to go to Warri for work a few days into the year. I had never been there before and got all sorts of warning and advice...yes o! Naija chic like myself. Naturally, a lot of them were just my friends jesting about the situation in Warri.

"Carry your Nigerian passport o!"

"Practice walking around with your hands in the air"

"Tan a little before you go".

With an earful, I boarded a plane headed to Warri. We were seated for more than 10 minutes but they still had not closed the door of the plane. We soon found out why...apparently someone's checked in baggage was leaking. They held up the small bag and there was liquid leaking out. Since they could not put it in the baggage hold like that, they needed the owner to come and check the bag. Dude got off the plane and opened the bag. It was 99% full of canned beer, one of the cans had been punctured and was leaking. Laughter rang out on the plane! Dude probably went for a party and carried awoof beer...I mean, as far as I know star beer is sold everywhere. The only reason one would want to transport it is because it was free.

The company I work for arranged for someone to meet me at the Osubi airstrip. As soon as I stepped into the arrivals "lounge", there were 2 guys to meet me. Great! They got my bags and we headed to the bus. That was when I officially started having doubts about my safety. I was the only passenger in the bus plus 2 uniformed & armed mobile police men. For what now? And on the trip into town, there was heavy army presence complete with barricades and sandbags. I had only ever seen sandbags on TV before. I have since learnt that the security threat has greatly reduced. The mobile police men that rode with me to work and back to my hotel were precautionary. They never really looked at me, apparently quite bored with these routine trips. After my initial surprise, I got used to having them there.

One last interesting thing about Warri: There are massive projectors? TVs? at Effurun roundabout and majority of the time, DSTV is on. I have seen it on at National Geographic, SuperSport3 and of course Africa Magic. Only time DSTV was not on, there was a documentary about the accomplishments of the state governor in the state. Not sure it has sound as the car windows never go down. One wonders how this helps the citizens of the state in terms of revenue generation.


  1. cannot believe someone thought it was a good idea to fly with cans of beer. Abi dem no get beer for Warri? I must ask Waffarian that question.

    Happy new year!

  2. Solomonsydelle, I go beat you oh!

    Ehen, shebi you don see the sand bags wey I don complain tire about?

    No worry, next time u must to visit me oh, my house dey very near effurun roundabout...where you stay? wellington hotel?(no worry, i no go kidnap u hahahahahah)

  3. @SSD: I asked the very same question on the plane. The guy was just an awoof master!

    @ Waffarian: LOL!Even if you kidnap me sef, I can only give kobo kobo. The paler people will get you $$ so why waste the effort?

  4. nawa o..have fun in warri and be safe! hope u r not there for long ur daughter with u?

  5. @ aloted: My daughter stayed in Lagos while I travelled to Warri. It was just a few days. Was Warri fun? Heck no! But it was restful after Lagos traffic.

  6. Happy new year my sistah

    Na wa for the beer guy o, na so beer expensive? lol
    Never been to warri? Why DSTV on the roads? Do people go out and watch ni? lol

  7. The guy must be a proper SAYO!

    You should have felt so relax and in control on your ride with the armed guys. Yes, the Waffy way

  8. The guy must be a proper SAYO!

    You should have felt so relax and in control on your ride with the armed guys. Yes, the Waffy way

  9. The guy must be a proper SAYO!

    You should have felt so relax and in control on your ride with the armed guys. Yes, the Waffy way

  10. I've heard a lot about warri since I grew up in portharcourt..never visited though

    Aren't your friends' suggestions funny....especially the one about tanning... seriously , is it that crass out there?
    happy new year to you and yours

  11. "...massive projectors? TVs? at Effurun roundabout..." when we have no 'substance' we make conscious efforts to make people accord us 'worth'.

    Ha, i can easily recognise you then, ....just have to look out for a babe with two mopol aide-de-camp.

  12. @ Writefreak: My sister, I tire. Happy New Year

    @ StandTall: I have not heard that word Sayo for some time now. LOL! Relaxed, ke? I am a Nigerian and understand the term “accidental discharge”.

    @ Joicee: I understand that there was a time when Warri was a city under siege. However, I was told that the risk to human life has greatly reduced now. Happy New Year!

    @ Rethots: I love that saying and in this case it actually tells the entire story. The thing was too dumb. Honestly. I have since left Warri…if you see a babe with 2 guards, no be me o!


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