Wednesday, April 22, 2009


If you have ever had the indignity of being approached by men who think that they are all that and a bag of chips, then this audio clip must resonate with you.

A few months ago, a married man approached me and offered me a car, driver and a house. Although I told him that I had the first two and was not homeless, he went on. He was going to rent the latter and according to him buy one for me if he was happy with the relationship. He also told me that on no uncertain terms was I allowed to date anyone else while we were involved. If I were to attempt to do so, he would know and that the punishment would be severe.

This clown also told me that he knew that since I was a single mother (he had to go there), I would need someone to take care of my child for me. He was going to act as a father figure to my child (make decisions for her and about her welfare) and all that he asked was that I treat him well and meet his demands. I was also exhorted to always remember that he was a very demanding fellow who needed me to ask "how high?" whenever he asked me to jump. True talk, he said that. Not in the same way or with the same words but it was the same message.

Did I mention that I had only just met this man, as in he spoke to me the day before and on the day he was reading me the riot act, it was day 2? He was also what my friend likes to call "grammatically dysfunctional." On top of that he had been sent abroad by his company to work for a year and had an affected accent plus a very thick Nigerian accent. It was painful to hear him speak.

Wondering why I even let him talk so much? My company liaises with his and I wanted to handle the matter in as undisruptive a manner as possible. Also, I was curious to know what he had to say especially as I recognized him for what he was: village boy who was lucky to get a good job that paid some money but not so much that he could be mouthing off like that.

When I told him my emphatic NO! he said he would give me some time to think about it as he felt that maybe there was something holding me back which I had declined to share with him. As far as he was concerned, he was offering a great deal and he may well be my last bus stop.

I could not take a day 3 of that ignoramus taking up my valuable time.

Tuesday, April 07, 2009

Frugal is the word!

This is a continuation from my last post. I am disabling comments because this is just supposed to be a list. If you want to add any thing to the list, please do so by commenting on the mail below.
Thanks to: Gee, Joicee, Moworld, Aloted, AfroBeat, Writefreak, Bloggarati (the name of the post came from him), Original Mgbeke and Tisha, for helping me build up the list!


Cut down on any unnecessary expense. A great way of doing this is tracking your spending. You buy anything, you note it down in a journal.

You don't need to buy the kids the latest toys. Gather all their toys in a big basket and bring out different ones each month. They would think it's brand new!

No more Mr. Nice Guy! Ok, I know there are some relatives that really need financial assistance but there are always some Oliver Twists in their midst. Anytime they show up, complain about UR financial woes. They won't bother u again.

Eating out/ Going out

Stop shopping on impulse for Clothin and shoes that are not NEEDED.

Cut down on excessive expenditure on perishable goods. Instead of buying lots of fruits and veg and end up throwing them away, buy just enough that you need.

Cut back on eating out, and you know Naijas love to eat out especially Naija people in Naija. As opposed to going to Mr. Biggs, Tantalizers, Happy Bite and whatever fast food is the new thing, pack your own lunch. I have saved so much money from not eating out 'cos that's how it adds up. Now I cook for the week in advance and pack it to work every day.

For people who go to clubs, they can cut down on it. Do you know how much a drink costs in those places?

Eat more home cooked food and spend less on buying food out of the house.

If you're constantly going to the movies, Silverbird about doing a movie day with the girls at your house.

Smart saving:

Live below your means: If you cannot save/invest at least 10% of your income you are living above your means. To live below your means you should save/invest about 20% of your monthly income, every other expenditure should be cut off or suspended.

Take a Health insurance and a life Insurance: This eliminates 2 major financial risks you and your dependents may face.

Invest in Real Estate using Investment Clubs: With the proposed decline in real estate, small investments in different real estate ventures, with minimal debt would be preferable to large investments. This form of investment is usually available using an Investment Club.

Fashion and Beauty

Buy a home manicure kit and do your own nails. I pluck my own eyebrows so that saves me $7 every 2 weeks or so that I would spend in waxing.

Cut back on impulse and unneccesary purchases i.e clothes, travel, weddings.

No more buying of aso-ebi. Ask for color code and check your wardrobe. It’s bound to be there (and if not, wear something similar, it's your presence that counts!)

If you no fit afford aso ebi let the bride know, cos for these parts some people charge some ridiculous amount for asoebi and bridal train dresses