I started getting THE QUESTION about 6 months ago-"So when is the party?'' For those who know me, I have an aversion to parties, weddings and all such socializing events and things so I decided to prepare their minds right from time. NO PARTY.
The reaction I generally get is disbelief and a loud “eh? No waay o!”
Their reasons for my need to celebrate?
Give thanks to the Lord for His Gift.
I am pretty certain that all the thanks I have given Him everyday for almost a year have been received. My Creator aint baal.
Did your parents not celebrate your first birthday for you?
And by doing so, did I sign a contract that I would definitely do the same for my own child?
This is one of the most important and happiest days of her life.
Granted, that is why we are having cake and ice-cream. Besides, she will have many more important and happiest days in her life to rival this one.
She will need to see pictures when she is growing up.
My family members and I plus any friends that pop by for cake and ice-cream will gather around her and take pictures around the cake.
In fact, there is no reason I can think of why I absolutely MUST throw a party for her. I have taken my daughter to 2 parties and each time, she was uncharacteristically quiet and withdrawn as though could not quite believe the crowd around her. How will she then enjoy this carnival I have been asked to throw for her?
I am more inclined to throwing her a party when she turns 5. At least that way, she will actually get to enjoy her own bouncy castle, train ride and the food that is being served, even the presents that she receives. She will also have her own friends there rather than just the adults that want to eat out of my largesse by chopping and getting their children entertained for free at her first birthday party.
Anyway, this week, perhaps because the pressure had intensified, I asked a friend and colleague whose mother has a catering outfit how much she thinks it would cost to cater to about 50 guests. Her quote seemed rather reasonable so for 30 minutes after our conversation, all those that asked me the "oh so important question" of when the party was going to hold, I told that I was thinking of just doing rice salad, drinks. That just opened a can of worms as they started with:
“Ah, no party is complete without bouncy castle.”
“Train rides, nko?”
“What about party packs? I am going to the market tomorrow. Just give me the contract” …*wink* *wink*…
So guess what? We are back to cake and ice-cream. Anyone who does not like it can choose a body of water to dive into. Lord knows that Lagos is about 40% water.
madame ! true talk o but i cant be belive my dearest little gal is going to be one soon
ReplyDeletei remember when i carried her a day after her birth i'm sure she'll have turned to a chic now anyway party or no party i'll be with her on her birthday !
@ not-so-anonymous: Hey you!! You are welcome to all the cake and ice-cream you can put into that small body of urs :)
ReplyDeleteI have never understood the hoopla and expense over a child's 1st birthday. The child doesnt remember a thing and like you said, its all about the freebies and lots of food for other people. I like the idea of a quiet thing with close friends and family and thanking God.
ReplyDeletePlease dont be pressured into unnecessary expenses and party packs.
Don't feel pressured into throwing a big shabang for your daughter. Believe you me, she'll not be interested and besides at just 1 year old, she doesn't know what on earth is going on around her. People just want to come and chop on your head. I didn't have a party for my daugher when she turned one. On the morning of her birthday, I walked her into the sitting room where she was confronted by a mountain of presents and she was so scared by it all she just burst into tears and refused to touch them. That was when I knew I had made the right decison not to throw a party for her. By the time your daugher turns three she'll really appreciate and understand what the celebrations are all about. Just as mine did.
ReplyDeleteMy sentiments exactly. I hate celebrations -- especially 'Nigerian' ones.
ReplyDelete@ all: Thank you for all your comments. More pressure has come, but I am staying strong and not bending.
ReplyDeleteIt's your child so do what you think is best. Cake and ice cream plus all the people she loves sounds good. Most people throw first birthday parties for themselves, not for the kids.
ReplyDeleteSo, did we have a party? I wanna know...
ReplyDeleteWelcome back after a long HIATUS!!
@gbemi: So true. The party is usually for the adults. And I refuse to play like that.
ReplyDelete@desola: I am going to blog about it. So you have to wait!!
She should be going 6 now....
ReplyDelete