Wednesday, April 22, 2009

Man!



If you have ever had the indignity of being approached by men who think that they are all that and a bag of chips, then this audio clip must resonate with you.

A few months ago, a married man approached me and offered me a car, driver and a house. Although I told him that I had the first two and was not homeless, he went on. He was going to rent the latter and according to him buy one for me if he was happy with the relationship. He also told me that on no uncertain terms was I allowed to date anyone else while we were involved. If I were to attempt to do so, he would know and that the punishment would be severe.

This clown also told me that he knew that since I was a single mother (he had to go there), I would need someone to take care of my child for me. He was going to act as a father figure to my child (make decisions for her and about her welfare) and all that he asked was that I treat him well and meet his demands. I was also exhorted to always remember that he was a very demanding fellow who needed me to ask "how high?" whenever he asked me to jump. True talk, he said that. Not in the same way or with the same words but it was the same message.

Did I mention that I had only just met this man, as in he spoke to me the day before and on the day he was reading me the riot act, it was day 2? He was also what my friend likes to call "grammatically dysfunctional." On top of that he had been sent abroad by his company to work for a year and had an affected accent plus a very thick Nigerian accent. It was painful to hear him speak.

Wondering why I even let him talk so much? My company liaises with his and I wanted to handle the matter in as undisruptive a manner as possible. Also, I was curious to know what he had to say especially as I recognized him for what he was: village boy who was lucky to get a good job that paid some money but not so much that he could be mouthing off like that.

When I told him my emphatic NO! he said he would give me some time to think about it as he felt that maybe there was something holding me back which I had declined to share with him. As far as he was concerned, he was offering a great deal and he may well be my last bus stop.


I could not take a day 3 of that ignoramus taking up my valuable time.

15 comments:

  1. Some men are so stupid, it's ridiculous. Like really, a fool at that old age is bound to be a fool for life, and there's no amount of brain cell replenishment that can help his case. So so sad.

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  2. What! OMG! I feel like slapping the guy! What guts! Rubbish!

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  3. oh my word!!!
    it's almost like "is this for real?", "is this the twillight zone?"
    I can almost hear the accent...
    LOL
    maybe you should give him some outrageous stipulations of your own and see what he says.
    Thank God that you're not homeless and that you're well able to take care of yourself and your child o... if not... see the nonsense that roams the street...

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  4. @ Original Mgbeke: Someone married that fool and if he was telling the truth, his wife is a doctor. Amazing!

    @ Writefreak: My sentiments exactly

    @ Diamond Hawk: It is actually scary that this is the sort of man that may come the way of a desperate lady. I bet a few people have had to shack up with fools like this because they felt they had no choice.

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  5. Lol...I'm sorry I had to laugh because I'm in shock...some dude felt he could come up to you and say this...why? What stupid right does he think he has to open his mouth and spill out such derogatory vile...

    What an utter dickhead...

    honestly some men should just keep their mouths shut...he aint your last bus stop some I'm glad u chose to keep on 'keeping on'...:-)

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  6. wow. Babe, whatever you do, remain professional. After all, there is business involved here. If you do not have to deal with him, have someone else step in every time he tries to take up your time.

    Some people are incredible SMH

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  7. Oh my GOD! He sounds just like my stalker at my former working place. I actually quit because of him. Grrrrr I hate men like that. I seriously don't get what's up with these men who think they are all that and carry no shame. Man. Just avoid him alltogether.

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  8. Is he for real? ...As crass as this may sound Im sure there are women that have fallen for his crap that is why he is soo confident...

    Girl, don´t mind him!

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  9. ROFLOL...some men sha! it's like he didnt listen to a word u said...

    conceited!

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  10. You sure sound like you took it really well.
    I don't trust myself with cocky men such as this one.

    He would get an earful, client or not!

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  11. are you serious? lmao! that's just, pathetic...I didn't think there were still people like that these days. Shows how much I know, innit?
    by the way, that youtube clip, I hope that it isn't real..'cos mehn...lol. not proper. and his phone number 416 area code..that's a Toronto number..I wouldn't be surprised if I've seen the Dimitri before...

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  12. @ Shubby Doo: Why? As far as he is concerned, he's male and I am female. 'Nuff said. Luckily, I have a choice. Some girls may feel that they have no choice in the matter. Just a week before I met this guy, a mail had been sent out by a colleague asking if anyone had cheap accomodations (preferably a boy's quarters) that a family of four could rent. Apparently, they were orphans with the oldest aged about 25 and they were being kicked out of their present lodgings. Imagine if this my pest had met one of the girls at the peak of their desperation...

    @ SSydelle: Luckily, I was able to pass him on to someone else and now only need to endure infrequent 30 second calls enquiring about my well being.

    @ Adaeze: You left your job because of a stalker? It's wrong! On his part. Kpele

    @ joicee: It is possible. Where I served, there was a standing joke that all you needed to get a girl was enough money to

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  13. are u kidding me!!!!!!! dis take d cake of hell dates. Jesus!!!!!! hold on a min, while i pick up my jaws from d floor

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  14. I wasn't on a date with him o!(Lord forbid! Tufiakwa! Nyama!). Hope you got your jaw back off the floor in one piece. LOL!

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  15. Don't know what happened to my other comments. Blogger, hmmm!

    @ Aloted: Not at all. he apparently loved that irritating voice of his.

    @ Enkay: Put it down to a mixture of suprise, curiosity and slight amusement.

    @ He says: Dimitri's real name is James Spears. He lives in Toronto and is a doctor who's license was revoked a few years ago for sexual offenses amongst othe things. You can read about him on wikipedia.

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