Saturday, May 19, 2007

Pregnancy Issues


“I am leaving my husband.”

I fell quiet when my friend dropped the bomb. I had last spoken to her a month ago so was not abreast of current changes/happenings in her life.

“I will leave him and then get a Senator to pick up my bills. Someone who will send me on shopping sprees abroad. When we fight and he needs to apologize, he may just do so with a trip to Seychelles or Paris. You know now! Get ready o! I will need someone to go with me on those trips.”

I quietly reminded her that she had a child and was pregnant with another.

“So? Look, Daisy Danjuma had four children when she met Theophilus Danjuma. Four children! Did it not work out for them? Don’t you see her in the papers? She’s even a topshot in government now. She wears diamonds. Diamonds! If you like say you will not follow me when it is time All I need to do is slim down a bit and tone so that my whole body will be one color.”

I asked what her husband’s offence was.

“Nothing! I just realized that I have not been living life to my full potential. This is my year to change things around. All I am waiting for is to drop this child and move on with my life. Kai! There is nothing worse than marrying a poor man. At least if you marry a man that has money, when he annoys you, you can close your eyes to his shortcomings with a shopping spree. Look, In my Head, forget everything I ever told you about marrying for love. Marry a man that has money! Marrying a poor man is not the best.”

I asked her if she has told her husband.

“No, I will just surprise him. When he gets back from work one day, he will find me gone.”

I remind her that I can hear her daughter in the background. She must have listening to her mum all this time. How do we know that she will not run to her dad and report the conversation (her mom’s side of it)?

“I am just praying. Don’t mind that girl, she loves her daddy more than me. She is always running to him to report my every my movement. Scheew”

That was when it dawned on me that this chic was not doing too well mentally. So I asked the next logical question.

How has the pregnancy been?

“Its okay, but you know I have been out of work (true she left her last job so that she could rest during this pregnancy) so I have a lot of time on my hands now to think about things. My mind has been everywhere. Thinking about what could have been if I had not married this poor man. You know the sort of people that were chasing me before now. Kai, if I knew then what I know now, I will not be here.”

Yes, it was the pregnancy talking. This poor guy had better not be anywhere in the labor room as my girl has some real anger issues and may just find some reason to hurt him physically there. Pregnancy has been known to affect people in strange ways.

Some people get bitchy. Some get cravings. Some even get suicidal.

Be nice to a pregnant woman today.

16 comments:

  1. Hahahaha...women and their issues! As if having menstrual periods isn't bad enough, we just had to couple this with other changes we go through. It's so joyous being a woman, isn't it? Bless her heart! Lol...

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  2. I can certainly understand her anger,and she won't ever leave her husband, so its all good, the baby will come,along with with everything good

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  3. Is this real? wow
    I hope its the pregnancy causing
    this attitude
    cause if not
    she'll have to excuse that am about
    to say
    thats a greedy woman.
    how would you marry a man as a
    meal ticket?
    don't her hands and feet function right? WTF?

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  4. im not sure this is just due to the pregnancy alone...

    ive been advised that pregnant women must be careful of the words they utter especially during labor...

    I hope everything works out well

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  5. LOL! Seriously, I loved the way it ended... Be nice to a pregnant woman Today! LOL!

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  6. yes yes be nice to pregnant women o.....lol seriously!ur friends has more issues that d pregnancy o

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  7. ok, this had me worried at first then I thought, she must be feeling the pregnancy blues. Tell her to hold on. There aren't too many Theophilus Danjumas' around.

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  8. lol i love this post how cute

    wow ive missed so much :-/

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  9. I thought I commented long ago? Blogger comment swallower :-(.

    Well, all the best to your friend.

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  10. YOu had me scared there. Lets hope it was just the hormones that were raging in your friend and she dosent put her thoughts to fruition.

    Is that what pregnancy does to us women?!?!?!!? Lol!!

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  11. I bet it was the pregnancy cos' even some single girls have that as their prayer point and part time career now adays. I wish her the best.

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  12. @Desola: Really "joyous". We have so many hormones rattling around in our bodies that it's a wonder we live a normal life.

    @For the Love: You have a lot of faith in this girl o!

    @diary of a G: She has been married for at least 5 years. She met him poor and married him poor although she was from a richer home. She actually did marry for love. I would like to think that it's the pregnancy that caused this outburst, but i also realise that she has some deep rooted resentments that has caused her to speak out now that her tongue has been loosened by pregnancy induced hormones.

    @diary of a G again: Same here.

    @diamond hawk: I hope it works out well for her too. Like i said to diary of a G, I think she has some issues that have surfaced now that she's pregnant.

    @Nyemoni: Yes o! You sef suppose sabi.

    @Pink Satin: I totally agree

    @mona: Hey, girl! Welcome back. I've missed your edutaining posts with all the links.

    @azuka: I can't count how many times blogger has done the same to me. Pele. I'll pass on your best wishes.

    @calabar gal: You will have stories to tell when u get pregnant! Ko easy o!

    @NK: Thanks for dropping by. I'll pass on your wishes. Thanks

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  13. Wow....Some very serious hormonal imbalances here...LOL

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  14. Nice blog. Great post. The cake looks more like they are incompatible. Phew!

    Ill be back.

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  15. LOL!!!

    First of all, that cake is maaad! Looks like it's a "Kill me, I kill you..." cake. Hehehe

    As for your friend, wow! Didn't know pregnancy could affect people like this ooo. I must investigate.

    ***Vera stomps off to go get pregnant***

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