update

If you read my post on friendly wahala, I said I was going to bring y'all up to speed with resolving my wahala.

Friend 1: I asked her for my money and she offered to give it to me in 2 payments. I put my foot down and today, I proudly have a cheque with my name written on it plus the full amount she owes. Naturally, I am never ever doing business with her again. Once bitten...?

Friend 2: I have stopped calling her back and she seems o.k about it. Not that it matters if she was okay with it or not. My mind was made up.

So I got sorted!

Child Abuse

My mum watches Newsline every Sunday Night and tonight I caught a rather disturbing story while watching it with her.

Blessing James is a 12 year old girl who lives in a shanty/face-me-I-face you with her dad. She got involved in a fight with neighbor’s son. When her dad came back from work (he’s a butcher) and heard about it, he decided to “discipline” her.

His idea of discipline was to tie her up, stark naked, for two days without food. She kept crying but he left her there. Neighbors could hear her crying so they came to plead with him to untie her and let her go but he refused. He wasn't with showing that he was boss.

He beat her on her legs with a cane. At a point, he submerged her hands and feet in hot water. Naturally, this was followed by screams. It took the neighbors calling the police on him before she was released. They had to break into the room as "Daddy dear" was not around.

By the time, she got to the hospital, she had developed contractures as a result of the burns. What this means is that her fingers and toes have bent and stiffened into place. She will need plastic surgery to straighten them out.

Hmmm! These stories seem to keep coming. We are still reeling from the sheer evil that is the story of Reverend Dr. King. Now this.

My theory is that"Daddy Dear" probably went to work, got pissed off by some colleagues but could not retaliate because he’s a coward. Got home, heard that his daughter was involved in a fight and decided to vent his anger on her. People that do these to children are usually cowards.

There was nothing said about a mother or siblings. "Daddy dear" is at large and the girl’s aunt is helping the police in locating him.

Another mentally and physically scarred child. And unfortunately, not the last.

The Silent Thief of Sight

I have worn glasses for about 20years ( I am not yet 30, so imagine that!). So for a LOOONG time, I have had to be dependent on glasses and contacts (a thankful breakthrough in technology for fine girls like me who hid behind spectacles, LOL!) for good sight.

The first thing I reach for in the morning are my glasses and they are the last thing I take off at night. Quite frankly, I hate all the bother and would absolutely love to have good sight and not have a panic attack when I need a replacement and the optician says it will be 2 days or even a day befor I can get my prescription filled. Sometimes, I have nightmares about going blind.

HOLD UP! Just realised that all this is long story and that I am making this post about me. It isn't. It is actually about my dear friend who for the past few months has been complaining about his sight. At first, it was that it was blurry and then that he felt really uncomfortable. I kept telling him to go to the optician, he complained that his hospital was dragging it's feet about giving him a referral letter (he uses a HMO). Anyway, at least 4 months after he started this sojourn to see an optician, he finally got to see one.

The sad news is that he has glaucoma. When he told me, all I heard was that he had cataracts which was suprising because I was not aware that it afflicted people in their 30s. "No" he said quietly, "GLAUCOMA -The silent thief of sight". I can not say that I know anything about the condition so I googled it.

Oh boy! My friend was quietly but surely losing his sight but had no idea. As it is, he's lost his peripheral vison and has to turn to look at anyone standing beside him. No more looking out the corner of his eye (stuff others take for granted). You may ask why he did not take quick action then. The thing is that it crept up on him and he kept "managing". If you've ever lost weight or gained a lot of weight, you will have found that you do not notice it immiediately. It's really a gradual proccess.

I was scared and even more so because of these facts:

* Glaucoma is the second biggest cause of blindness worldwide.
* It affects around 60 million people, of whom about 6 million have become blind.
* Half of those affected may not know they have it because symptoms may not occur during the early stages of the disease.
* By the time the patient notices something is wrong, the disease has already caused considerable damage.
* The vision lost to glaucoma is gone forever.
* Medications and surgery can help slow the progression of the disease, but there is no cure.
* People who have a higher risk of developing glaucoma include:
Myopia: short-sightedness
Diabetes
High blood pressure
African-Americans

Glaucoma is really just about a lot of pressure in the eye which leads to damage of the optic nerve.

This is what the vision of someone that suffers from glaucoma is like.

This is actually gradual, you don't wake up and the world is like this.

So please, everyone, go for a test. It's pretty basic and really easy. Yours truly is going for hers pronto. I'll be truly heartbroken if anyone puts up a post saying that they developed glaucoma and did not know abiut it because they did not go for a test.

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Friendly wahala

Have you ever had to wean your friends of a bad habit or change the tune of your friendship? Its the beginning of the year and I have these two friends in view.

Friend 1.(She's actually just one level higher than acquaintance and two levels lower than friend)

This chic owes me money. She specifically asked me to get some stuff for her from America in 2005 which I did. I handed them over October, 2005 and she is yet to finish up with the payment.

Right about after then, she found out that she was pregnant and since the Daddy did not want to be in the picture, she had to carry her burdens herself. Understandably, I thought it best to give her some room. Right? Wrong! To be fair, she paid about half the money in two installments (I always find that a bit confusing) 6 months later.

Well this is January 2007 and I am yet to get the rest of my money. It is not as though I do not see her. I see her at least twice every week, a lot of times, more. Unbidden, she mentioned in November last year that she was going to give me the balance of the money in two installments (more confusion and makes the money really useless for me). I still haven't seen a dime. Meanwhile, I saw her a few days ago and she excitedly told me that she had new pictures of her baby which she wanted to show me. She rifles through her bag and brings out a spanking brand new phone that had the pictures. She has also expanded her wardrobe since that time (I notice these things) and still no money for me.

I do not understand what it is that gives some people the liver to do things like this. Well, I have given myself a week to deal with the issue. I had better be seeing my money this month.


Friend 2. (My very good friend who I thoroughly love to bits)

This is actually a very good friend of mine who I believe has decided to abuse a privilege. Brief story: I started working before her and so have a bit more money to play around with. I also, by dint of my job get a fair bit of "credit" on my phone each month. It's also a business-plan line so my call tariffs are lower than pay-as-you-go.

Okay, so as a good friend, everytime she calls me, I cut off the call and call her back so that she does not spend any money calling me. Good of me? Nope! Apparently bad.

Not long ago, my younger brother was using my phone and perhaps picked up her call as it came in because he had just pressed the YES button to send a text when the call came in. She cuts off immediately and when I am given the phone, I call her back. First thing she says to me in clipped tones (read: barely controlled annoyance) is WHO PICKED UP THE PHONE? I calmly inform her that my brother did. She as silent for a few seconds and then she says okay like "it had better be". That was a "huh?'' moment for me.

A week later. I am at work and about to make a call. I press the YES button just as her call comes in again and she cuts of ASAP. I call her back when I am done and the same weird conversation as before plays out. That for me was a deciding factor.

I have since told her that I will not be calling her back and that if she needs to call me, she should know that she will be paying for the call. I really like her and before I would let a few measly naira spoil our relationship, I will nip that in the bud. She's friendly with the family so sometimes flashes me and asks to speak with my sister when I call her back. WTH? Why don't you call my sister or flash her? It's most upsetting when I am at work and have to interrupt what I am doing to call her back only to have her ask to speak to a member of my family.

So, I have dealt with number 2 this week. Will let you know how it goes with number 1.

Pictures In My Album

Sometime late this year, I started taking pictures of different parts of Lagos. Unfortunately there are no pictures of the nice looking parts (and there are a lot of nice looking places in Lagos). Thought I would share what I have with you. Unfortunately, I did not save all the pictures on my flash so I may have to share the rest with you some other time.

I was on my way to Surulere and made the mistake of going through Apongbon(?) bridge. Little did I know that a lot of construction work was going on in Lagos Island. I remained in the traffic for over an hour. I was the only one in the car so I spent some time taking pictures and rocking the Lionel Richie tape I bought for N100.00 on the bridge:)

A portion of the bridge was turned into a car park with Alaye Boys (Area Boys) controlling that particular business.

You can buy almost anything on the bridge. Hawkers abound.

Puff-Puff anyone?

Even an ironing board for your laundry..

I was on Eric Moore Street, Surulere when I saw these men fixing some electrical fault. Thy should win an award for best safety practice;)

Making a living under the bridge (Jibowu/Yaba)

The other side of the Jibowu/Yaba bridge

Fixing Bar-beach, Victoria Island (again!). It looks much better now. Will try and get new pictures.